Something to cheer you up

Here are some of my favorite lawyer jokes. They all come from this page (worth checking out).

***

A junior partner in a firm was sent to a far-away state to represent a long-term client accused of robbery. After days of trial, the case was won, the client acquitted and released. Excited about his success, the attorney telegraphed the firm: "Justice prevailed."
The senior partner replied in haste: "Appeal immediately."

***

Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day:
My name is Billy. What's yours? asked the first boy.
Tommy, replied the second.
My Daddy's an accountant. What does your Daddy do? asked Billy.
Tommy replied, My Daddy's a lawyer.
Honest? asked Billy.
No, just the regular kind, replied Tommy.

***

A lawyer, named Thomas Strange, was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it.

"Here lies Thomas Strange, an honest man and a lawyer," responded the lawyer.

"Sorry, but I can't do that," replied the stonecutter. "In this state, it's against the law to bury two people in the same grave, and the authorities would be confused. However, I could put 'Here lies an honest lawyer.'"

"But that won't let people know who it is" protested the lawyer.

"Sure they will," replied the stonecutter. "Everyone who reads it will think, 'That's Strange!'

Academic senate

The academic senate is a decision-making body of a faculty that approves internal regulations and annual budget of a faculty and, among other things, selects a dean-elect for the nomination by the rector. So much for the definition. I joined the senate two years ago when there were two candidates for two seats and, as I pointed out during my electoral speech, there is no democracy where there is no competition. I joined the other two guys, made the audience laugh, and won the whole thing before I could even consider whether or not I actually wanted to become a senator. :) The first thing I learned about this work is that the definition from above doesn't fully describe what the senate really does. I mean, it does approve the internal regulations, but the last word has the university senate who sort of approves our approval. Furthermore, our regulations cannot contradict the university regulations. This reduces our legislative authority significantly. Stripped of many powers it once had, the senate of today serves as a forum where student and teacher representatives meet and discuss various issues concerning the faculty and study of law. There are ten teacher senators and ten student ones. This is somewhat unique because equal representation presents a threat to the faculty, but in the conditions already described it doesn't make any difference because we usually take a vote only on insignificant matters. Important things are regularly based on "gentlemen agreements" between students and teachers. If one is skilled negotiatior he or she can do much for his fellow students - much more than forcing his opinion through outvoting his opponents. The last remark goes to the presence of the dean during the senate sessions. This is both positive and negative thing. He is the man that makes things happen so it speeds up things that are acceptable for everyone. But he is also the employer of the teachers and they are less likely to disagree with him. In my opinion the executive power that he represents should not influence the legislative body, even if it's unintentional.